chouchouanso: Transgender models.

chouchouanso: Transgender models.: Female models are most often on the cover of a magazine or catwalk model than the male, but it slowly change. After the hype of  plus ...

Some Capital Health bathroom stalls get transgender symbol | The Chronicle Herald

Some Capital Health bathroom stalls get transgender symbol | The Chronicle Herald

Well today is another day, I will struggle through it and I will survive it, because I am strong. Is just surviving from day to day all there is for me? I hope and dream of a life with less stress and more peace. A life that I can final be myself, be accepted and be loved as my true self. A life where the people that I love and care about love me for who I really am. I want to feel loved, secure, and peaceful. I want to view tomorrow as bright blessed day not a gloom filled day that I must act a certain way to survive then repeat the next day. Is that wrong of me to wish for such things? An outsider would see my current life as almost idealistic. So, does that make my hopes of changing this life a selfish need? I do know, I do not want to hurt or upset anyone I care about but at the same time I must look out for my own happiness. Dr. Seuss wrote, “Life is a great balancing act” in his book, “O the place you will go”. It is days like today that I feel I am not doing a good job at balancing my life.

Life Update

Life is hellish these days! I am a 47 years old transgendered person, “male to female”. I became aware that I am transgender about 5 years ago. I have struggled with gender related issues all my life but had no idea what it was. Now I know, but now I find it very difficult to make any progress in my treatment. Today I find myself unemployed, and actively looking for work every day but so far nothing. Do I look for work in my male presentation or my female self? I have stopped my therapy, I have stopped my electrolysis, and I have stopped seeing my doctors for lack of money. My wife is supporting our family. She has made it very clear that she only loves the male part of me. I love her more than words can say but it kills me to know she does not love the real me. We have a 6 year old son who I love very much, he is my shadow, following me around and coping everything I do. One of my biggest joys in life is spending time with him. The last thing I want to do is hurt him. I am fearful that transitioning will scar him. I am a very spiritual person, I know there is a God and he loves me. What I don’t know is where I go from here! It seems my choices are very bleak. Right now I am very masculine in my presentation; to past I am going to need of a lot of work; i.e. hrt, laser hair removal, more electrolysis, surgeries FFS GRS Augmentation etc., all of which take money lots of money from what I understand. If I could afford to move forward with my transition my wife will divorce me, take away my son, and I will possible be living on the street. If I don’t continue to transition, the pressure of living a lie and keeping my true self buried is building and building inside me making each day harder than the day before. I don’t how much more I can survive. When I look at living the rest of my life not being my true self it looks bleaker and bleaker. God what am I supposed to do?

APA Revises Manual: Being Transgender Is No Longer A Mental Disorder

APA Revises Manual: Being Transgender Is No Longer A Mental Disorder: pThis Saturday, the American Psychiatric Association board of trustees approved the latest proposed revisions to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, what will now be known as the DSM-5. This marks a historic milestone for people who are transgender and gender non-conforming, as their identities are no longer classified as a mental disorder. [...]/p

2012 Volvo XC70 Review | Best Car Site for Women | VroomGirls

2012 Volvo XC70 Review | Best Car Site for Women | VroomGirls

More Company Health Plans Cover Trans Employees | Advocate.com

More Company Health Plans Cover Trans Employees | Advocate.com

First Trip to the Electrolysis

I had my first electrolysis treatment last week. The tech was very sweet to me; I think she could tell that I was quite nervous. She explained to me how the procedure worked and that we could stop at any time. It did not hurt as much as I thought it would. My session lasted about an hour. The biggest disappointment came when the tech told me it would take about a year to get rid of all my facial hair. Inside I just wanted to cry, I want it all gone now, no I wanted it all gone twenty years ago, but I have wanted this long what is one more year. I am eagerly looking forward to my next session, with each session I am taking a step closer to being the person I am meant to be.

Lack of Support

How do you deal with lack of support? I attend a support group for a short time until the program ran out of funding. I live in a very conservative area and moving is not an option. For me I have started writing which has helped some. I am so tried of justifying how I feel on the inside to those that are suppose to be my support network. Since I have come out to my closest family and friends, I have gotten bombarded with question like, “How do you know you are transsexual?”, “You are being selfish, think of (fill in the blank here)”, “How do you know your life will be better after you complete your transition?”, “If you go through with this I want nothing more to do with you”, “If you do this you are damming your soul to hell forever”. I just want say thanks for the support.

Shame and Embarrassment

After being in therapy over 6 years dealing with gender I should not feel ashamed about being Trans. But I do, for some reason for which I can not explain I am still embarrassed and ashamed of it at times. Which makes no logic sense to me; I now understand I was born this way. Logically I should feel no more shame than a person who is born with only one leg or any other birth defect.
When I go out I am always so careful not to be read, I just want to blend in and be treated like any other woman. It makes me feel like I am a criminal on the look out afraid somebody is going to find my secret out, expose me as fraudulent woman and whisk me off to gender jail to spend all of eternity for my horrible crime. I know that is silly and ridiculous but that’s how I feel from time to time. Is that crazy or what I should know better?

A day of firsts

Today I went to a nail salon and had my very first pedicure. I was very scared and I had to muster up all the nerve I had to do it. As it turns out there was nothing to be afraid of. Everybody in the salon treated me nice. My anxiety drop and I relaxed and thoroughly enjoyed myself. I am looking forward to my next trip to the nail salon.
Also, today I made my first appointment with an Electrologist for two weeks from now. I am very nervous about this; questions keep running through my head, how much will it hurt? Can I afford to finish what I start? How long will it take? Will it scar my skin? For now I guess time will tell.

To transition or to not transition is the question

My earliest memories in this life were of feeling like I was in the wrong body. All of my life I have wanted to be female. Seems rather a simple statement to write, but if it is such an easy statement why has it taken 45 years for me to get to the point that I can bring myself to write it down?
I struggle everyday with the question, to transition or not? There are so many factors to consider. I just want to be at peace, in my own head, I am tired of the incongruence between my head and my body. The answer would seem to be easy, I need to transition, but it is not that simple for me. The reality is if I do transition I will bring all of my family and friends along for the ride whether they want come along or not.
Factors I must consider is my marriage to my wife, whom I am very much still in love with. Will she leave me? What about my four year old son? My son adores me, follows me around, and mimics everything I do. Will I lose getting to see him every day? Will he lose having a positive male role model in his life? Will he be teased and bullied growing up with trans-father? Will I lose my job? How will I pay for transition without a job, huh how will I pay for it with a job, health insurance will not cover it. Am I health enough to survive it?
In addition, I live in an ultra-conservative state. I grow up here my family and friends live here; so moving is not an option for me. In the past trans-people have been assaulted even murdered here, will I be putting myself in harm’s way? Will I have put my family in harm’s way?
Will I ever be passable? I have a large masculine body, deep voice, and lumbering walk. I worry that I will never pass as a natural woman. Just how much can surgery and hormones change? That feeds into my dilemma if I will never be passable then what have I gained by transition?
All I know is that I feel like I am living my life in gender HELL. I can fake acting like the typical male with the best of them but it feels wrong like an act. All the while I must keep repressing my inner true self who wants to be expressed but does not know how. All I want is to be genuinely feminine to be loved and to love, to live in peace the rest of my days.

Why are transsexuals so hated?

Why are transsexuals so hated?

(Especially, by the conservative right?)

What have transsexual done to merit such scorn?

I am a transsexual myself (M to F), I didn't ask for this. I have tried every thing to make my gender dsyphoria go away, nothing worked. The only thing that has brought me a small measure of peace was accepting that I was born this way. I was born with a female brain trapped inside a male body. So each day I wake up and try to be the best person I can be, I mind my own business, I work hard, I pray to god and I love my family. But everyday that I step out of my house as my true self, I get rude comments, snickers, pointing, looking at me, threats and more, where ever I go. And if that is not enough to put up with, try looking for a new job as a transexual?

Since I came out as my true self I have been fired, and not rehired for any job not even one I am over qualified for. Why?

Is it to much to expect, to make a living and live my life in peace in 2009, I mean sometimes I feel like I am living in the 1950s.

Why is it ok in Western Society for women to wear men's clothing and TABOO when men wear women's clothing?

Ever wonder; why it is ok in Western Society for women to wear men's clothing and TABOO when men wear women's clothing?

Why do you think Western Society is like that?

Is it because Western Society is a male dominated society, and thus must treat anything feminine as being inferior?

I find this weird because not too long ago in Western Society men wore clothing that would be considered "feminine" by today standards.

Is it comfort? Suggesting that all women’s clothing is uncomfortable so they are forced to wear men’s clothes for comfort?

Is it homophobia? A man wearing a skirt must be gay?

Is it religion? Some religions state that men should not wear women’s clothing. Again, looking to history (not that long ago) what was consider acceptable macho male attire would be consider very feminine today.

It just seems that this is an unfair double standard in Western Society that we just keep accepting and passing on from one generation to the next.

What do you think?

How do you explain transsexualism to non transsexual people?

I have started slowly coming out to close friends and family. But as I do they keep asking me the same themed questions asked over and over again.

"How do you know you are a transsexual?"
"Whats makes you think you are a transsexual?"
"What do you think you can do as a women that you can't do as a man?"
"I just don't understand."
"You are too masculine you will never pass as a woman so why try?"

I know I am a woman on the inside, and I try to tell them it is about me making my outside match my inside. But that is not clearing it up for then they are still confused. I believe they mean no disrespect, they just want to understand. So they keep asking the same themed questions over and over. I feel I must not be explaining it clear enough.

Is this typical for people who are coming out? Or are my friends and family being to nosy? Does anybody have a good simple answer to help me explain what I am going through to non transsexual people?

Would you be upset if you found out that your neighbor was a transsexual?

What would you do if you found out that your neighbor was a transsexual?
1. Would you stop speaking to your transsexual neighbor?
2. Would you tell the rest of the neighbor hood?
3. Would you be afraid to let your children play outside?
4. Would you stop letting your children play with your transsexual neighbor’s children?
5. Would you try to get the neighbor hood association to bring legal action against your transsexual neighbor?
6. Would you accuse your transsexual neighbor of bring down the neighbor’s property value?
7. Would you vandalize your transsexual neighbor’s property?
8. Would you tell your transsexual neighbor, they are breaking Gods law at she is going straight to hell for all eternity?

What would you do ???

Now consider what would you do if you’re the transsexual?

Would you leave your spouse if they were diagnosed with gender dsyphoria?

If your husband or wife told you that the consular they had been seeing had diagnosed them with gender dsyphoria. (Meaning they were a transsexual but had not start to transition.) Would you stay with them or would you leave? Which ever you would do please explain why?